Monday Is The Day

I don't know where to begin! Here I am, 15 weeks pregnant in for a routine tummy check appointment when they discovered a strange lump on my neck. The thyroid does weird things during pregnancy so it was no real cause for alarm. I made an appointment to my doctor for a little thorough look at this bizarre lump. She has me swallow water, and asked me a barrage of questions such as "Have I been in any pain?" The answer was no. If the OBGYN had not felt my neck, I would never have known.
She sends me for an ultrasound. The ultrasound tech was acting strange. I happened to look at the screen when I saw the big white colored mass on the screen. The tech called out some doctors in white coats who began asking me the same questions, "Are you in any pain?" NO, I am not in any pain! What the heck is going on!
The next step was a biopsy at the ear nose and throat doctor's. No big deal, a little pinch, some annoying sensation and off the specimen went to the lab. A phone call 2 days later gave me the dreaded answer, it was thyroid cancer.
The phone call next was what shocked me. I would need surgery to take out this big mass next week, at 21 weeks pregnant. Pregnant? Can they knock me out while I am pregnant for surgery? I guess they can, and they well intend to on Monday.
I have not had my surgery yet, it is in 6 more days. I have researched "life after thyroid removal", "thyroid cancer surgery side effects" and all the other terms you can imagine only to become more scared and frightened than ever before. I have read that people lose their hair, become fat and depressed.. I think by reading all that I have lost some hair from stress, gained some weight due to crying in a bowl of ice cream and have definitley become depressed!
It isn't a lobotomy. It is just a thyroid. I am going to forget all that I read, walk into this determined not to let it control me and to give it one heck of a fight. At 29, and pregnant - If I can do it, you can too. Positive, positive, positive. Positive attracts positive and you will only become what you let yourself become. If I lose a little hair, I will get extensions. If I gain weight, I will run up and down the street every damn day until I drop pounds like crazy. If I become depressed, I will fill my home with the sound of happy music and get a good anti-depressant! Let everyone else be fat bald and miserable. I am determined to win and not lose myself to this damn disease. That is why I created this blog, to conquer it and to help you to do the same with me.